As a kid I took a swig off my Mom’s Coca Cola. She had been using the can as an ash tray. Puked for five mins and can recall that taste in a second as an adult.

Fresh ginger.

I didn’t put it there but when I was in college sharing an apartment with my brother and his wife they got a dog and when they got it home the instant it got through the door it beelined for my lap and slipped it’s tongue ALL the way along the roof of my mouth. Decades ago and I can still feel it.

Of things that were intended to be eaten, my friend in Amsterdam had some super salty black licorice. Don’t want to yuck his yum, but that shit wasn’t fit for human consumption.

I sip Malört and enjoy its nuanced flavor notes. Durian tastes like paradise. Natto, however, broke me.

One time when I was a kid, my friend and I decided to take random stuff from the pantry and just mix it all together into one drink. That was genuinely heinous.

Accidentally half ate a catepillar once.

It crawled into the bag of snacking cheerios on a camping trip.

… still feed bad about accidentally killing that little guy.

I guess also maybe you could count earning my redwings, though it wasn’t like I was ingesting it, and frankly, I didn’t even find it disgusting at all, but it seems most people are disgusted by this.

I’ve done a good bit of martial arts, am quite used to the taste of my own blood in my mouth… hers was basically just a slightly different flavor of blood.

I had a century egg once. Like a hundred rotten eggs suspended in a salty pond-muck jelly. My body literally refused to swallow it.

there was this chocolate with a clear filling, i ended up scraping the flavor off my tongue with my nails.

Fundamentally, ass. Absolutely nothing about it is logical. Don’t care, as long as it’s freshly showered and no questionable bowel situations.

Uniquely gross, tuna salad as my taste and smell was coming back post-covid 19. I had it often before, I have it often now. But something like a month after covid, the only thing I tasted and smelled was the fish oil. Put me off of it for like a year. Got over it

I tested the buttering agent on coin cell batteries. Very bitter. I’ve also blown my car’s radiator to speed up a coolant drain through a small outlet. Same buttering agent. I also unintentionally coated my hand in liquid compressed air (upside down) and clicked my finger a little later eating chips. You guessed it, bittrex strikes again. On par with malort.

My girlfriend-at-the-time’s dirty, dirty ass. Thought it would be like in my fantasies, where it tastes like candyfloss and smells like a Yankee candle. Nope. Shit. Just shit.

If you’re curious, shit tastes exactly as it smells. I wish I didn’t know that. Although I’m happy that now you, too, know that.

And she had the nerve to dump me later. I deserve a Nobel peace prize for not recoiling in horror and instead just powering through in silence like a fucking GENTLEMAN.

On the bright side, it became a great way to ensure future partners were cognisant of the issue. I’d drop it into the usual “what was your ex like?” gossip sessions that come with new relationships. It’s like saying “please wash your various holes if I’m gonna go rooting around in them like an ant-fiending aardvark” without actually saying it. A cautionary fable from days of yore to guide the next generation.

P.S. I’m still pro-anilingus. Just… clean the fuckin’ thing first. I don’t need to be picking dingleberries from between my teeth, thanks.

A particular man’s penis. I realized too late that he didn’t routinely clean under his foreskin.

Cat treat. Ate it on a dare. It was fucking foul. 0/10.

Live ants.

This was 30 years ago. I lived on the second floor of an apartment. I left a half-eaten bag of Little Debbie chocolate donuts on the floor next to my bed. The next night, in a dark room, watching David Letterman, I remembered and reached for the bag. I was three donuts in before I noticed the slightly strange taste, and the ant crawling on my face.

Ants taste a bit sour and bitter.

Gasoline. Had to siphon, did it wrong, mouthful of gas.