I wanted to be a developer, and create the kind of games that I wanted to play. Now, I just want to survive.

I feel that there is some world that others were brought into, that I was left too long to believe that I am a part of it, and I suffered a lot, trying to have the normalcy that others take for granted.

This is not my world, I don’t belong in it. My goal is to become independent enough to not have to worry about other humans exploiting me at all, or die trying.

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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: December 5th, 2024

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  • You can’t join the army, because your body aches and hurts. It’s pretty sad, but many doors close exactly at 30 years old. I watched my doors close while I was trapped surviving, unable to do anything about it. And the army was one of the things I wanted to go through (but I found that executive disfunction would make that rather hard).



  • As they say, it’s middle aged… as in not old or young.

    His fun time is over regardless, he is supposed to be a factory slave, and that is what really pisses people off.

    You are basically expected to spend the rest of your youth, away from eyes, degrading your body so the next generation can play their part in their 20’s (pretending to be living it out, with fake experiences), then go to the soul-eating factory to continue the cycle.

    Then your dad does this, and pisses the slavers off.



  • I was probably playing on that old Nintendo I borrowed from someone. It was old even back then. I was not quite on the internet yet I think, might have been playing Miniclip flashgames, found out Newgrounds, and discovered things that would have been better if not.

    I wanted AI allies in Starcraft, so I rigged together what would look like allies, from what limited things I can do with the scenario editor.

    I had all sorts of great ideas, but I also started to become more and more aware that I had to do something. I was a hyper kid that could not sit still, and caused problems all the time.

    They claimed I was suicidal, so I spent time waiting in the cold to be sent over a bus to the capital city, so they could pump me full of drugs and break me, and I would never be the same since.