Dönertier
It’s been a while
The animal at the Restaurant at the End of the Universe that wants to be eaten.
Thats a cow. Or at least that’s what they called the genetically modified creatures.
The gingerbread man
Pulled Winnie the Pooh.
It’s honey marinated and fat.
I believe one of the lines from the song is ‘stuffed with fluff’ so I don’t know, could be a little fuzzy.
This. Winnie the Pooh is canonically a teddy bear, presumably only alive by some sort of magic. Likewise, Kanga, Roo, Eeyore, Tigger and Piglet.
Rabbit and Owl, however, were real, living creatures - the true inhabitants of the wood - with related magic allowing them to interact.
So basically, yes, Pooh isn’t edible.
This is the winner
Eating bear is how you get brain worms tho
Chocobos are just large chickens, so…
you know you can just eat ostriches right? It was a meme in the 90s to open ostrich farms, they might have all closed by now though.
no one is talking about that, and that link will stay its original colour, thanks.
Your loss, it’s a pretty decent running gag from Letterkenny
There are no ostriches shown at all
I mean, there’s at least one less since last year.
You can, but the post is about fictional creatures.
Birbs aren’t real
Popplers
Oompaloompas.
Willy Wonka had to literally rescue them and protect them to keep them from being eaten because they’re so delicious.
Yeah sure, let’s trust some candy oligarch that won’t spent a bent penny on any safety measures for his factory.
I am sure some slaver has used the savage cannibalism story to justify their ends too…
probably between a dwarf, smurf hybrid?
Tauntaun, but it has to be served lukewarm.
Underrated comment right here.
But I thought they smelled bad on the outside?
So do goats, but they’re plenty tasty.
Had never heard of that before, thanks for mentioning it.
Särimner seems like an easy choice tbh
Granted. The gods of Valhalla all have old white man taste buds, and it’s main “flavour” is dry and tough.
Whichever old white guy you’ve met can’t cook pork properly
It might be regional, but I’m not making this up. It’s definitely a thing on the Canadian Prairies, and South Africa, at least for the rooineks. Pretty sure I’ve heard about it from England and the US Midwest as well.
It’s not just pork, either.
the SET creature in egyptian mythology, nobody know what it is supposed to be. demon meat, since inuyasha has made it popular of eating demons on demon crimes.
dragon meat?
Mooshroom is the only one I can think of right know, I think their meat would taste like standard cow meat but embedded with mushroom flavor or something like that.
Oh! Also could SCP-999 taste good? It’s like a blob of orange jello from what I recall. I wouldn’t want to eat it but it would probably taste good.
iirc 999 smells like peanut butter, so it might taste like it too. Eating it might be hard though, I think it’s one of those hard to kill types.
Smurfs
So you know in the Monster Hunter games where you eat a big ol’ feast before a hunt?
I don’t know which monster they cook up, but whichever it is, is probably incredibly delicious.
It’s cooked by cats though, so you’ll be picking fur out of your mouth every other bite.
Ameglian Major Cow
Waiter: Would you all like to see the menu? Or would you care to meet the main dish of the day?
Arthur: Meet?
Trillian: What is it?
Waiter: It’s an Ameglian Major Cow. I’ll bring him over.
Zaphod: Ok, we’ll meet the meat. that’s cool. [a large Pig-like creature is wheeled in on a trolley]
Dish of the Day: Bweeeh… [clears throat] Good evening, Madam and Gentlemen. I am the main Dish of the Day. May I interest you in parts of my body? [Arthur and Trillian go “Huh?”]
Ford: Oh, well.
Dish of the Day: Something off my shoulder, perhaps, brazed in a little White Wine sauce?
Arthur: Your shoulder?
Dish of the Day: Well, naturally mine, sir. Nobody else’s is mine to offer. [clears throat] The, uh, rump is very good, sir. I have been exercising and eating plenty of grain so there’s a lot of good meat there. [moos] Or a casserole of me, perhaps?
Trillian: You mean this animal actually wants us to eat it?
Ford: Me, I don’t mean anything.
