ol_capt_joe

Push Wagner out of Africa

Still, best of luck to the Kurds

Ok, when? Because… Well, should we tell him?

Exclusive: Trump says you have to invite him to your birthday party and give him presents and he gets the piece of cake with the fancy chocolate thing on it

Well you see that’s where Trump’s level of genius shines. Don’t shoot the archers, shoot the arrows (it looks way cooler and people think you’re so badass).

Sure you might lose a naval vessel or twelve when US capacity to build more ships is really low, but that’s a sacrifice this level of genius is willing to make (totally unawares, probably).

Guess how much 😁

Compared strings, no match.

Long live spice rice 🚀🍚

‘Not enough people’ isn’t as bad as ‘not enough money’. And since money is a made up thing, I’m sure everyone will figure out who to eat if there’s not enough to go around 🤑

Unpaid student loan debt

Circumcision is literally genital mutilation.

I read that wrong -

Judge orders Italian food?

Oh, judge orders Italian food to arm its delivery workers?

This just in: one bajillion percent tariffs on blabbermouth Cambodia for making Trump ‘the peacemaker’ look like a useless idiot.

Trump, chairman of the bored of peace

If anything comes out of that ring, be sure it finds its way to that special briefcase!

They banned telegram, but they still have reddit 🧠

Bro did his country proud ✊

‘helmet featuring portraits of Ukrainian athletes killed during the war’ …now, that is respectful. It’s only political in a way that if you’re punishing people for it then you’re the baddies.

If it had instead been a helmet featuring Calvin pissing on 1mil+ dead Russian soldiers, then there would be room to criticize (on behalf of Bill Watterson, of course)

Which timeline is this… 24 hours after Trump gets elected? Or the too weak two weeks when Trump was supposed to get Putin to agree to a ceasefire? US needs to get its house in order.

Good, and hopefully other nations join

Not only that, but their land-gains also completely stopped since starlink was cut off.

Spending unsustainable, casualties increasing, gains halted… I expect we’ll hear another nuclear threat soon (desperation confirmation)

Go to hell, or mars or wherever just fuck off