I don’t have a favorite line, but this copypasta always comes to my mind when I think about Kif:

I used to have 50,000 posts on a fucking really weird, small, Futurama forum. There were only about 50 posters on the entire board.

For some reason I literally roleplayed as Kif (the frog who was a slave to Zapp Brannigan) in every single fucking post. I remember that the other posters would say things like ‘post your penis again for me Kif’ with a picture of Zapp and I would do it (after using photoshop to make my dick green).

I was basically a fucking sex slave for 50,000 posts. I remember on one occasion a girl came onto the board and I really liked her, but instead of talking to her like a normal human I tried to pick her up by writing an extensive, 1200 word post describing the backrub I gave to Zapp Brannigan.

I hate that part of my life almost as bad as I hate this current one.

Show them my medal, Kif!

And it’s powered by love! …also you have to wind it.

And mix these mixed nuts!! I see two almonds touching!!

[Weary sigh]

Z- This whole sector is uncharted
K- It’s not uncharted. You lost the chart.

The jackass wants to see you in his quarters.

Sigh…“sexlexia”

Zapp: “clear my schedule”

Kif: takes out etch-a-sketch and shakes it

For soon, the quivering mass of life within me will depend on us both. Even now, I can sense it feeding, squirming, searching, questing. And shortly, it will rend my loins in twain, burst forth and pull us down, down, down into the deep, dark waters of commitment.

I’m not as big a fan of velour as you are.