• RunJun@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    8 months ago

    Anyone who is going through this, you have to try. You have to put effort into yourself and get used to rejection. It’s not fun but if it’s important to you then it’s important to show up.

    I didn’t have my first kiss until 26. I have a wife and two kids. Just so you don’t think it was easy for me.

    • /home/pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      8 months ago

      I find it hard to find people though. I do my regular activity and hobbies and go about my life, I make friends but they’re mostly guys. I’m also not the type to ask every cute girl out. Idk, I still got one more year at school so maybe something will happen

      • fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        8 months ago

        School is a great place to meet people organically. Talk to your class mates. Even if they’re not a girl you want to talk to maybe they know someone.

        Outside of school sadly dating apps are the only way to meet people. And they’re not good.

        • tyler@programming.dev
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          8 months ago

          That’s just not true. Get a hobby. There are tons of people doing activities all the time in groups all over the world. Climbing, painting, sewing, there’s hundreds of thousands of activities you can do and people in every one of those groups.

    • PlasticLove@lemmy.today
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      8 months ago

      Can’t.

      I spent my whole life being told to not be a creep, don’t just go up to women they don’t want random men approaching them, they’re at the club for a good time with friends, etc.

      So that only leaves online dating and I’m not a 10/10 so never get a match.

      • trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        So that only leaves online dating and I’m not a 10/10 so never get a match.

        Bullshit. That’s just toxic internet culture talking. You may have to put some effort in your profile, but it worked for me and I’m a 6 at best.

      • BigBenis@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        My advice is to get off the internet and get involved with your community. Go to social events, not with the intent of finding somebody to date but with the intent of making friends and connections. Show up as yourself, don’t try to be somebody you aren’t in an attempt to impress, that’ll only mislead people.

        Our society treats dating like job interviews, you get an hour tops to make a good impression on a total stranger. It works for some people who are naturally attractive whether it’s their looks or charisma and because that works for those people other people try to emulate that and get frustrated that it doesn’t work for them. Even if it does, that attraction is often superficial because it’s based on a false version of themselves.

        In my experience it’s much easier for attraction to grow naturally between people who interact regularly and is more likely to last when those people are showing up as themselves from the beginning.